There are times when it is even more important than usual to be kind to yourself.

One such time is when you are shedding your old self and becoming your new self. When you’re no longer the person you used to be and not yet the person you’re going to be.

Take the example of a teenager: no longer a child and not yet an adult.

But there are times when the reason for your unsettled self is less obvious. It may be because of an Aha!-insight, your stage of life, a change in circumstances. It does not really matter what caused it. We feel in a funk* and don’t know why. Those of us who are analysts by inclination and strongly left brained will insist on looking for a reason, sometimes to the point of analysis paralysis.

By definition a time of change is an uncertain time. We don’t know how things will work out. We have to trust, hold to faith and be patient. Easier said than done when you’re in a funk.

If you’re a careful observer, you might catch yourself thinking thoughts like these:

‘I’m such an idiot.’
‘I have squandered an opportunity.’
‘I don’t know.’
‘I am not getting anywhere.’
‘I don’t want to.’

What happens when you go on a self attack spree like this? You go deeper into the funk. Why? Because you’re focusing on all that negativity and what you focus on expands. In law of attraction speak, you can only attract things that resonate with your feelings. And because you’re feeling low, guess what, you get more of what you don’t want.

So be kind to yourself.

1. Stop the self attack. Notice the thought and let it go. It’s not the thought itself that’s the problem; it’s what we make of it. Instead of running with the thought, just observe. It helps to say to yourself ‘interesting thought I’m having’ or ‘interesting that I should have that thought’.
2. Give it to God. Whatever it is you feel overwhelmed by, or that bothers you, write it on a note and put it in a jar, your ‘God jar.’ You are showing the Universe in a very physical way that you trust it will be taken care of by handing it over to the Universe, God, Holy Spirit, the Angels. Substitute your preferred word for the force that is bigger than yourself.
3. Quiet time. Take 5 minutes in the morning to set your intention for the day, give thanks, pray, meditate. It sets you up for the day and puts you in a better frame of mind to handle whatever comes your way.
4. Converse with nature. Go for a walk in the countryside, on a beach or if that’s not possible, walk around the area where you live. Notice the trees, shrubs, flowers, buds, animals, creepy crawlies, birds, water. Feel the wind in your hair, the ground under your feet. The air on the skin of your face and hands. Listen to the sounds.
5. Do some gardening or work at your hobby.  Notice how you feel when you do this. Carry that feeling with you when you’re not busy with the garden or hobby.
6. Listen to music. Classics, the earthy rhythms of drums or music that celebrates nature.
7. Water. A large percentage of our bodies are made up of water. Water helps us keep clean inside and outside. Drink, shower, bath, swim and imagine letting go the dirt, debris, negative energies and unwanted thoughts.
8. Journal. Getting your thoughts and feelings out on paper helps clarify your thinking. Pour it all out into your journal. There’s no reason even to read it; you just want to get past the top of mind stuff that’s holding the real nuggets of insight and inspiration hostage. It’s not an essay and for your eyes only. Make your journal your friend and pour your heart out.
9. Solitude. Spend time with yourself in silence. No computers, no mobile or cell phones or other electronics, no music, no radio. A different kind of detox that can feel quite scary.
10. Spend time with people who ‘feed’ you. You know who they are: the ones you love being with because you feel so good in their company.

Bonus:

11.  Go barefoot on the grass. It “grounds you” making you feel instantly better. Research is showing that the health benefits from walking barefoot on the grass come from the relationship between our bodies and the electrons in the earth.

There… a handful of the old favourites.

What are your thoughts? Are you gentle and kind to yourself? What are your favourite ways to be kind to yourself when you’re in a funk?  Please do leave me a comment in the box below.

*Funk – used here to describe a sense of a non-descript unsettled, low feeling mood.
An online dictionary describes it as a feeling of being depressed or overwhelmed by anxiety or fear.

Photo Credit:  Irum Shahid